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Healthy Sex Starts Outside the Bedroom | Why You Struggle to Open Up to Him in the Bedroom

Updated: Sep 14, 2022

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Are you nervous in the bedroom with him, or does he not make you feel secure outside of the bedroom to allow yourself to get 'freaky' between the sheets?

Being sexually intimate with another person requires you to be vulnerable, physically & emotionally. Becoming vulnerable can be difficult for some women due to past relationship experiences, insecurities, sexual abuse or simply because we are still establishing trust and security in the relationship.

Most women (and men) require emotional security with their partners before having sex. Without emotional security first firmly set in place, the less likely you can honestly open up and relax in the bedroom.

Emotional security is a large part of the foundation for a healthy and stable relationship, sexual or not, and gives us the comfort of being seen and accepted as we are, with little to no judgement from our lover.


Do not beat yourself up or blame yourself if you do not feel comfortable and relaxed in the bedroom with him - yet. Your body is incredible at performing vibe-checks to protect you from people and situations that could cause you harm.

If you don't feel safe, secure and accepted by your partner, your body may react by resisting having sex or restricting all physical touch with the partner.

However, when you feel safe to be naked, in body and soul, to your beloved, you should have no trouble letting out your inner 'freak' because you'll be fully present at the moment with no hangups or insecurities to hold you back from having carefree fun.

What Can You Do When Resistance Strikes?


- Trust your Intuition:

Whether consciously or on an energetic level, your body senses that this situation should be a no from you, dawg. TRUST that message!